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Armenian bomb expert robot makes mistake only once

30 March 2010 [16:00] - TODAY.AZ
When in a previous article, I described the new "obsession" of the Armenian government to create an unmanned aircraft, I assumed that this would mark the end of the know-how of the Armenian military and industrial complex. It turned out that I was mistaken.

It was only the beginning ...

Recently, it became known that in the near future Armenia will hold a contest of military robots. The most important and interesting thing is that we are talking about robots produced in Armenia.

Manager of the Open Championship of Robots in Armenia (the country even has this tournament!) Mariam Nahapetyan said creating the military robots begins with resolving the simplest problems.

"In the first contest, the robots will be created to search for mines and will be able to quickly detect mines while walking on earth," Nahapetyan said.

It is hard to say what inspired the rulers of the neighboring country to decide on such "great” step as creating military robots.  It is possible that “Hurt Locker,” a film directed by Kathryn Bigelow, who recently won an Oscar for best film of the year, played a role in the matter. Let’s give a brief note to those who have not seen the movie about American army bomb squad in Iraq.

According to the plot, the bomb experts avoid mine clearance using a special robot, but fearlessly decide to do it themselves.  

The "fearlessness" of the Armenian soldiers is known far outside Armenia and the test of recruiting staff for its bomb squad division has simply failed. As a result, the Armenian military had no choice but to resort to the services of robots. To purchase robots from well-known producers requires money. Exchanging brandy for robots with foreign partners will not work.

Armenia has nothing to pay for the military robots. In the end, they had no choice but to invent the robots themselves, and most importantly to begin to produce them.

Nahapetyan, who thinks of herself as Kathryn Bigelow, did not elaborate how the military robots will be made. And a plant will not be built for the same reasons mentioned above.

In this case, it is easy to imagine that they will be assembled in the courtyard of Uncle Armen out of garbage from the waste bin. The robots' lack of a brain will be compensated for by the iron logic of Armenian rulers who claim anything and everything left unattended. Discovering the mines, the robots will rush over and claim them as their own, not letting anyone touch them.

They will not be able to defuse more than one mine.

It is terrible to think what the so-called Armenian robots of future generations will do. However, it is reported that world-renowned Japanese robot manufacturers have sounded an alarm and are going to send an entire delegation to Uncle Armen's house shortly.

After all, the Japanese are not aware of the conceits of Armenian officials…

There is one positive thing about this story. The fact that Armenian rulers are thinking seriously about mine clearance should be commended. They understand that returning the occupied Azerbaijani lands is not such a far off event and no one will help them to clear the mines. Let them clear the mines they have planted themselves. Thus, the "engineers" and "designers" from Uncle Armen’s house should try hard not to disappoint... 

H. Hamidov

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